I walked into the bathroom here at work and a smell transported me back to being 17/18 years old. Haha. That sounds bad, doesn't it? It was a good smell. I think they changed the urinal cakes to a different manufacturer and the fragrance was something similar to a shampoo or conditioner I think I used to use when I first moved out on my own. Very vividly I could see my old bathroom, the shower curtain, the bottles of shampoo in the shower. I remembered the Costco pack of toothbrushes that were under my sink and my bed mattresses that were frameless on the carpet. I had such gay posters. Haha. Oh what a time warp that was.

Then....as I was washing my hands---BECAUSE YOU SHOULD ALWAYS WASH YOUR FUCKING HANDS AFTER LEAVING THE BATHROOM!---I remembered an odd incident that I couldn't understand at the time but completely understand now. I was taking some classes at Fullerton College and used one of the bathrooms. While I was at the urinal, a guy walked in and washed his hands, then he walked over to the urinal to pee. I washed me hands and left. I was perplexed at the time. Why would you wash your hands only to dirty them and then have to wash them again? Years later I found myself doing the same thing.... because I had been eating and my hands were sticky. The light bulb illuminates.

What is it with these restroom memories? Maybe I'm feeling too clean. Actually...I feel greasy & gross. I haven't shaved in a couple of days. I've been wearing my glasses because I think my contacts are irritating my eyes too much so I'm going to try glasses for a couple of weeks. Maybe they'll be rose colored.

I finally responded to an e-mail from Ryan. I could tell in the brief words he used it was his way of opening a door for me to make a move. He's always like that. Some things don't change. I let him know my days off and he sent a line back about "perhaps" we can get coffee this Sunday evening. What is it with people and coffee? What would people do if not for coffee? I don't drink coffee, so when people say, "Let's meet for coffee." there's this piece of me that feels like I'm being sucked into the mainstream---not in a good way like when I want to go to the movies on opening night, but in a bad way like I'm paying taxes or getting a corporate day job. Err..umm... gee. I guess I'm already part of the masses. But coffee... I have to draw the line there. Haha. And it's not for any real political stance, I just never have liked the taste. But I'll go get coffee (hot chocolate or warm cider) and see what this boy looks like now and see if we have anything in common and see if there's any of this sexual chemistry there than never quite got tapped into. Who knows. You never do until you try.