Salad Soup (Indy Pen Dance)

I didn't reset my alarm last night to compensate for the 30 minute shift in work hours today so I have an extra 30 to ponder this morning. I've already read/deleted my junk e-mail so I thought I'd expand on that fruit salad. I mean...it's only good while it's fresh; eventually even the sweetest juices make the salad soggy.

We need a vacuum. I thought my holiday pay for Memorial Day was going to be in the last paycheck, but it wasn't, so I'm waiting for that because the bug situation in this apartment is really bugging me. (That was sad.)

Tonight we have been invited to Lost Angeles to spend time with Brian and others. Low key, nice, friendly, and probably exactly the environment that I need before going out dancing tomorrow night.

Just this last Sunday I went out to "The Boom" with Nathan & Ryan. I honestly had a lot of fun there. Chuck & Jeff, Randy C., JD, and some others. The free admission and my jumping bean legs were a good lure. While leaving I heard my name called by Joseph, Dustin's ex-boyfriend. He's a dancer there at The Boom now. He had the same reaction that boys seem to have when I mention that I'm going home to my boyfriend: "He let's YOU come out dancing without him?" I always sense an implied insinuation when people say that, but then again I usually sense an attraction on their behalf too. Another ounce of gay culture that I've grown accustom to.

I was told by Nathan last week that we may need a new roommate by the end of July, but in the same conversation I was told that nothing is certain yet and he really wasn't sure. I've been riding this out, waiting, understanding that there are issues and complications that are so far beyond my helping him that just keeping afloat here is best for now. Though my fruit salad contains these thoughts of seaching for a roommate, the real juice here is finding this friend who can't find himself. In some ways I feel like I'm condoning/contributing to his inability to stay away from drugs by going out and doing them with him. It's maddening. It's ridiculous seeing him happy while out and really expecting that he's made great choices and then the next day watch him skip a therapy appointment and the day after that say less than 10 words to me. After what he's told me about his work, I don't even know if he has a job anymore, but will find out by conversation when the time is right for him.

My mother seems pulled back lately. I think it's just her new class, but I know that Byron not speaking with her lately plays into that. I need to write him a letter as calling him is too awkward. We don't talk either, so what would words on a phone mean while he's surrounded by neaderthals.

Ahh...the knell of work....

j.r.me