Poof!

Car Kit. It was always the kiss of death when a phone would go into this mode. Mine did it last night when I was trying to be reached. Maybe the phone knew I didn't want to receive the particular call. I slept in the car until 6am. No dreams.

When I got home and laid in the comfort of my own bed, I quickly found myself in dreamland. It was the type of dream that you don't know at the time it isn't real. I felt happy. Sadly. In the dream I was living with my ex, Randy. There were several other people living in/around our condo. Many of them I didn't know. Some children. Everything felt completely familiar though. I think that my survival instinct must have kicked in at some point because at the end of the dream, I heard my phone ringing, but when I went to it, there was no caller I.D. and no sound coming from it. The ringing continued. I realized that it was coming from his phone. I picked it up and started to talk and it was Arturo. When I ended my conversation with him, I wondered why he would be calling on Randy's phone to talk to me and not mine. I quickly realized, and I can picture the whole scene in my head like a movie where one's expression is slowly coming into the know. He wasn't calling to talk to me, he was calling to talk to Randy. Even in my dream, though I know the happiness that I had, the reality of his repeated actions come through. Not even in a dream do I let myself be fooled anymore. It's another layer of innocence that sheds. Skin raw.