Kim's Letter

Mom came home early. VERY EARLY. I've been up since 5:30am because of the noise created when she arrived home.

I've decided to use my writing time today to respond to an e-mail from Kim. Here we go:
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How cute. Adorable. Darling. Have you heard all of these descriptors in response to your children's pictures? I remember a time when we would make fun of people who doted on their kids in such a way, but it's an obvious inevitability when you love children so much. ((By the way, I do think the pictures have been precious. Please keep them coming.))

Were you getting postcards in the mail right up until a few days before the 10yr reunion? When I got mine I wondered what the turnout was going to be like if they were still advertising that late. Do you know of anyone who went? I've heard nothing about the Queen Mary rendezvous. Did anyone drown? Maybe I should e-mail Margaret for a re-cap.

I'm actually writing you from the "writing lab" here at school. I'm getting .5 units for spending 16 hours in here this semester. I originally signed up because my English professor was giving 1/2 a grade add-on for any papers that we wrote while "conferencing" with one of the writing lab instructors. I've subsequently dropped the English class, but the focused time alone here is nice for catching up on e-mail, keeping my journal entries and working on short stories, novel chapters, poetry. My writing still goes in spurts; nothing regularly produced. I've been meaning to write ever since the birth announcement. VOILA! Here it is. And I find myself wondering what I'm typing.

I think my delay has been that I'm never one for small talk. We had a small party at the apartment about a month ago and there were a lot of people who showed up that I didn't know. Randy is good at being social and "working the crowd" so to speak, whereas I'm keeping this partial fake smile on my face and nodding while I listen to inane details of their day. My anti-social veneer is more prevalent here at school. I have a morning class so most of the people are just coming out of high school. The conversations that I overhear! I know I'm old because I have that thought, "Did I talk like that when I was THAT age?" And it doesn't feel like that long ago to me. My mom says that it never will. She turns 50 this year and she expressed how even though she can see a difference in the mirror, inside she still feels young. So perhaps I'll always be a cynic inside. Always a little dreamer. Always part smart-ass.

So as we grow older, do you find that common "adult" conversations center around:

1) kids (or pets if people don't have kids)
2) careers
3) money (credit cards, home loans, buying homes, refinancing,cars, bikes boats...etc)
4) health (doctor visits, diseases, "that something that is going-around-the-office)

I can't escape one of these conversations in a day----OH, unless I partake in one that the 18yr olds are having here in class. Haha. But somehow the importance of regular jeans or faded jeans never really hit me as something I'd want to talk about. ((And still don't)) I came back to school to keep plugging away at and some where get up to near 120 units. I have 24. =) I'll have 29.5 at the end of this semester. Typing that right now even made a smile go across my face as I'm typing. It's funny how little I've done with education and how "full of promise" I was when receiving a high school diploma. I was discussing careers with Randy and I don't think there's anything that I WANT to do for any long period of time. I fear that teaching may be the same way. ((The running joke now is that by the time I get my B.A. I'll be retired and teaching will be something I do in my spare time.)) I took my CBEST test in April and passed. It was a joke. I haven't had a math class since Junior year with Ledvorowski and I'm taking College Alegebra right now. It's a M-Th class. I show up once a week just to let the professor know I'm still there and the material all feels like review. It's amazing what I remember. And each time I remember, I still have that secondary thought, "WHEN IN REAL LIFE AM I EVER GOING TO USE THIS SHIT?!" I think having experienced 10 years of real life now I'm justified whereas in high school I was just bewildered with the prospect of more homework.

Rant rant rant...

I hope you're staying healthy(4) and that your kids are well(1). When do you go back to work(2)? Back already? Hmm....I didn't ask about money(3), but some people are weird about that stuff, I've learned. ((So it's impolite to ask...))

SERIOUSLY. You stay in my thoughts. I'm glad you're doing well.

love ALL-ways,

j.r.me